Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Forgive Yourself

I just finished reading an entry from one of the many blogging moms that I have. The entry from Kat's "heart2heart" can be read by clicking here. It talks about forgiving those who hurt you. A topic of which unfortunately all of us are oh-too-familiar with. But as I was reading, it struck me. We talk about forgiving others so much that when it comes to us single moms, we forget to forgive the person who matters the most, ourselves.
When going through seperation, our initial reaction is to point fingers at the other party. But then again, there are some of us who'd rather blame ourselves. We suffer from the "If only" syndrome. We wallow in our regret in not doing the things we should have done or feel guilty for not having taken the initiative to prevent the relationship from falling apart. We feel worthless. We feel that we are failures and that we don't deserve to be happy or to be given a second chance. We just want the world to swallow us up rather than to allow us to carry on living our "shallow existence". We've temporarily forgotten that as Christians, our devastating circumstances can be used by God just as much as He uses our values and gifts.
Like with any other broken relationship, if we want to be healed, we must first confess our sins to God and fully accept His forgiveness. You see, some people do confess their sins and pray for forgiveness, but rather then lifting it up to the Lord and feeling a sense of peace, they keep their sins buried in their closet and continue to walk around with unnecessary guilt. They continue to look back at their mistakes failing to realize that as soon as God had forgiven them, He had forgotten their sins. In fact, if you were to look back at your mistakes, it should be for your benefit. Use it for personal reflection to gain wisdom and healing. Otherwise, don't look back at all.
God would never harm you, that's why He uses whatever circumstances you're in for your benefit. However, it doesn't mean that the enemy isn't busy at work. He's that little voice in your head that fills you up with guilt and anger. He badgers you with the notion that your a failure and uses that against you so that instead of moving forward and growing, your stuck in reverse. DO NOT LET THE ENEMY WIN! Know that when you prayed for forgiveness, God washed it away with the blood of Christ! Just as Satan uses your failures to discourage you, use Christ's blood and God's love as a means of defense!
Forgive yourself. Allow God's love and forgiveness to surround you. Say sorry to yourself and to the other party. I know that it's easier said then done, but in the end, you're the one who greatly benefits from it. You take responsiblity for your actions, and you have peace in knowing that you did the right thing. Only then will you truly start to grow in God.

1 comment:

  1. Reese,

    Great post! Now I see where you were going with this. It is a great path to stay on for you. It makes all those negative feelings go away if you can forgive not only those around you that have hurt you but like you said, yourself, as well.

    I see so much progress in your posts from day one and so glad that God is helping you through this process.

    I am just thankful that God carries a really big eraser, so once I confess my sins, they are gone.

    Love and Hugs ~ Kat